| just for fun. |
[Aug. 27th, 2010|09:18 am] |
today is the 27th of august 2010.
it is 9.16am and i have yet to sleep since last night.
it is ramadhan.
and this year has been the worst year ever.
i hate my life.
i hate that i am living here and not everywhere else. |
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| Grad Show. |
[Nov. 28th, 2009|12:45 am] |
three days in a row of this.
fun but exhaustive. |
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| too long. too overdue. |
[Oct. 27th, 2009|11:39 pm] |
man i havent blogged for so long. and so many things have happened. but today will be a picture update.
the modeling gig happened. and it went well. fortunately. i was about to walk out when i saw the other models. couldnt deal everyone was so pretty. no pics yet it's still getting retouched.
so ive just been partying and partying and partying. here are ze photos.
and this week is the last week of uni. FOREVER!
which means a gazillian word assignments due this friday.
yay fun.
the one week break.
2 exams.
and over.
eeee.
end.
im really gonna miss the coast when i leave even though it's so fucking shit. |
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| Dazed & Dazed |
[Oct. 9th, 2009|01:26 am] |
i have always not been the type to eat well. i mean, i like food but i don't love it. sometimes i don't eat because i'm lazy.. not because i want to lose weight or whatever because obviously i am not fat. and sometimes, a lot of "eaters" can't believe me when i say it, i will forget to eat. for some people when there's the hunger feeling they'll go and search for food right away but i'm so used to the hunger that my brain and body doesn't compute anymore to look for food so i just ignore it so i will forget to eat. and i normally just have one meal per day... which is normally dinner and just drink or smoke throughout the day. so healthy.
so a few days ago i got gastric. a mild version. self-diagnosed but i know what it is because i've had it before.
my diet is fine for me at the moment but i know it's gonna be peril for my future health and from what i've felt these last few days. i'm not gonna like it. so i've taken the conscious effort to eat healthier, smoke less and buy vitamins in hoping my body will like me again. i donno why i just wrote that but i just felt like it. so many people live in the moment, which is good but i think after a certain age, seriously it's all about the future. i guess i'm using food her because it relates to more people rather than if i talked about cigarettes or drugs or drinking.
so there you go.
ive been so lazy at uni. i havent been for soooo long. and its shit because i dont want to fail any subjects because i havent been failing so if i do right this sem i will graduate and be free and start work etc and then move and do whatever it is i want/wish to do. it's coming so close.. if everything goes to plan university and studying life for me will end in 2 months. FOREVER. can you imagine? i can still remember finishing high school. i thought i'd never miss high school but fuck i miss high school. and there is this part of me that kinda wants to fail a subject or 2 this semester so i can stay at uni for at least another semester because im not ready to make these life-changing, adult, major choices and decisions yet. is this wrong? i think all i'll do is my best throughout this sem and during the finals and whatever happens, happens, i'll be relieved both ways. fail or pass.
i know from the start we've established that this is nothing more than what it is. and we're both not looking for anything at the moment. we're both too young to be tied down and these are the days and years to be free. but no matter how many people i've been with or am around i'll go back to thinking about you. and i can't wait to see you next and i know you feel the same way too because you've said it. and i like what i see in your eyes when you're looking at me. no one else feels the same or tastes the same. and of course even smells the same. it is so funny because i'm into all this expensive designer scents and the one you wear is the most common one out there yet it's all i look out for and look forward to smelling. and youve made me realise how great and amazing it is to wake up next to someone in the morning or even go to bed with someone at night and have someone to put my arms around in the middle of the night when i can't sleep. so it is what it is and i really dont want anything else to happen because im not good with relationships and i like you too much to be in a relationship with if that makes sense. whatever happens, happens. it is what it is. even though i'm up for the opposite, the last thing i want right now is to fall for someone. what's going on at the moment is fine and good for me and you and im just writing all this here to get it off my chest. and it sucks that youre always busy and im always busy and you live so far away. but i know the next time we'll meet.. it will be too good. even better than before. |
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| parklifeeeee |
[Sep. 27th, 2009|04:17 am] |
today was such a workout/running/sweaty day!
today was the parklife music festival which i desperately wanted to go to.
but the tickets were really expensive like 180 or some shit so ridiculous.
so decided to break into it today.
...unfortunately i didn't get through but one of my friends did.
bastard.
there were soooo many people at the festival like thousands and thousands and thousands.
la roux, crystal castles, empire of the sun, rapture, metric etc etc etc etc etc etc etc
played i cant fucking believe i missed all this.
i got to hear la roux from the outside.. good enough.
and a bit of CC.
when everyone started to leave... i just kept looking at their faces.. on the way out.. because i was sitting at the exit waiting for the friend who got in to leave..
i've never seen so many people fucked up on drugs in my life!
literally thousands were fucked and some had to wear sunglasses while walking on the streets at night coz they couldnt control dem "eyez" hahaha.
so jealous.
but so fun.. everyone's feeling the same things listening to the same sounds experiencing the same shit.
fuck. ok next time im buying a ticket.
tried so hard to get in ran here and everywhere..
broke into the bushes stepped on watery rocks stepped in a fucking pond and the lifeguards were laughing at us who were tying to break in coz they werent security guards or police.
im not kidding but almost 200 of us formed this massive group to try and break in and create a diversion.
we all ran for the barricades to try and knock it down and climb over it.
sooo crazy and scary and fucking exciting.
i love breaking the law hahaha
we stopped trying after they brought dogs. im not gonna die and bleed for parklife im not that deperate.
but yes i nearly made it to the barricades after crossing the muddy bushes and water except the people in front of me got tackled by the police and the security guards and some undercover cop punched this other guy omggggggg and i was like fuck this shit and ran back to the muddy grounds and when i looked back while running i saw a fucking police office running after me like chasing me OMG i got soo scared haha i ran like crazy and jumped over some bitches and then lost him thank god.
i was so close to being arrested.
again.
but anyways in the end we just got dinner and chilled in the city.
thats it.
we've been getting these sandstorms lately.
such crazy weather.
feels like im on mars or something.
goodbye. |
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| puasa nak abes |
[Sep. 17th, 2009|01:19 am] |
exams are over so no more studying and stressing for a while. except my dad called me a few days ago saying the internet bill is 500 bucks. shit. and im meant to pay half. okay cool whatever. even though its not my fault. there goes my partying fund for melbourne.
on that note i will be visiting melbourne for the first time next week!
really excited. cant wait to walk everywhere and people watch.
i cant wait to be able to sit at a coffee shop during winter and have my coffee and cigarettes at the same time!
i cant wait to meet new people and shop and omg do so much shit.
anyone who's been to melbourne please let me know places to visit and see okay.
im gonna spend a week and a half there.
accomodation isnt confirmed. anyone with a couch or an extra bedroom?
i'll do anything for free accomodation.
haha.
and i donno if i want to do this but someone i know is graduating from fashion school and she has to do a photoshoot for her collection that she has designed for the graduate show. and she wants me to be in it and i really dont want to because i'll be posing with 5 other WHITE SKINNY TALL HANDSOME/CUTE MALE MODELS. like wtf. im gonna feel so fat and short and ugly around them. i think if i were to do it i would probably hide my face behind some bushes or i donno just somehow find a way to hide my face but yet be able to show the clothes. how like this? ill probs need pounds of make up on my face and i will probably have to wear heels or something.
ok that's it.
raya this sunday!
how not exciting.
i hope i wont be hungover during raya prayers again this year. |
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| on a side note. |
[Sep. 6th, 2009|12:45 pm] |
i forgot to mention that the other night when me and my friends were drinking cheap wine near the beach, the police drove past and stopped when they saw us. i saw their doors opened and we fucking ran (while still clutching our bottles) like motherfuckers. i've never ran from the cops before. or have i? i cant remember. but anyways everyone ran and the lesson here is to run and hide the bottle and then continue running but i ran and continued running with the bottle which then exploded and splashed all over my shirt and jacket. for those of you silly cunts who dont drink, mmm think running with an opened bottle of coke and having your thumb over the lid so it doesnt "splash". bad idea. so when that happened i put it on the bench and kept on running and some cheap ass ho bitch stole it and ran away with it. what a shitty slut, i could have herpes or some rank disease. after all the drunken running we lost the cops. thank god. and then walked back slowly and tracked back where everyone hid their bottles and resumed drinking in public again.
so that was my first actual running away from cops experience. (from what i can remember)
i just felt like documenting it by writing about it here.
and in a couple of weeks im going to sneak into a big music festival.
i feel like such a delinquent. |
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| sober weekend. |
[Aug. 9th, 2009|07:15 am] |
i only went to one day of uni this week out of three.
shit. i feel so guilty.
im gonna go for every class next week i promise!
the reason for this is because i couldnt wake up! the classes are so early like 8am or 11am eeee.
on friday i went up to brisbane with some friends.
had dinner and walked around just go get away from the coast for a few hours.
took the 10pm train back and nearly missed the train and i didnt wanna wait for the next one coz it was gonna be an hour later so i rushed through the gate without even buying a ticket. they dont normally check anyways.
BUT OF COURSE.
THEY HAD TO CHECK THE ONLY TIME I DIDNT BUY A FUCKING TICKET.
the ticket checkers came on the train halfway back to the coast and i was pa-fucking-nicking. the fine is 200 bucks. im not ready to part from my money for such a shit reason like that. they were giving some guy a fine at the end of the carriage so it took them awhile to get to me. and then the train stopped and I RAN OUT OF THE TRAIN HAHAHA but it was the ghetto. fucking scary ghetto place. i was scared. thank god i had a friend with me. it was so quiet and dark. we had to wait for an hour in the dark ghetto station. and it was freezing cold. i was so fucking annoyed. thank god there was a maccas 10 mins away from the station. so we just chilled there. another train came after that and then went home got changed and went to e.l.s.e.where. so this kinda big band was playing on the coast and it was the launch of their EP so we went to see them but we were too late. arrived at 230am. so shit. a lot of familiar faces and it was really packed inside and its not normally on a friday night but a lot of peeps came out to see the band.
and then we got invited by one of the band members to go back to their apartment and hang out. it was fun. everyone sat in a circle smoking and drinking beer. (except for me because i dont drink beer). and every few mins someone from the band would stop the music and start playing their guitars and we'd all sing along. and i tried on all their leather jackets haha. it was so chilled. and on the tv was this dvd of a burning fireplace hahaha. it went on for hours and there was even crackling so it "felt" like it was warm in the apartment. im surprised there were no drugs. it was too late to get any so everyone just settled for beer. it felt like a scene from almost famous haha because i felt like such a rookie and everyone else was cool and were rockstars. me and my friends left at 6am. the sun was up and it was fucking freezing. didnt really know where we were so we walked along the beach for 30 mins trying to find a landmark and we finally found a maccas and ate and then caught a bus home. all the morning walkers and joggers and old people who wake up really early to exercise were giving us these stares like eh fucking rude please we had a rough night.
anyways here are some blurry pics.
thats the lead singer of the band he looks like daniel johns the silverchair dude. uncanny resemblance.
and as good looking.
got cute cat! hahaha
end. |
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